A recent study by Josh McDowell paints a stark picture of pornography’s impact on marriages within evangelical communities. The findings reveal that a staggering 79% of men in these churches use porn at least monthly, and a concerning 55% of marriages are negatively affected by this issue. This trend should be alarming: pornography often breeds disconnection instead of intimacy, deepens secrecy, fuels distrust, and ultimately can destroy marriages.
Many women find themselves trapped in the agonizing consequences of their husbands’ pornography use. They experience isolation, shame, hopelessness, and helplessness. They try everything they can to salvage their marriage — increased sexual availability, heightened patience, forgiveness, grace, or cultivating a more loving environment — yet often see no positive results.
Rosie Makinney, guest on Focus on the Family with Jim Daly, offers a powerful message of hope: most women haven’t grasped the single most effective strategy for change—encouraging their husbands to enter recovery. While sudden conviction can sometimes spark change, it’s more common for married men to seek help when directly asked by their wives. This can be liberating news for spouses facing this crisis. It means you don’t have to passively wait until your marriage teeters on the brink of divorce before taking action.
Makinney explains:
- How pornography hijacks a man’s brain chemistry, disrupting his connection with his wife.
- The importance of establishing a clear zero-tolerance policy regarding pornography in the home.
- That women aren’t merely fighting to eradicate porn but striving for deeper vulnerability, honesty, and authenticity within their marriages.
These strategies are explored further on your local radio station, online, or through Apple Podcasts and Focus on the Family’s free phone app.
For those directly grappling with marital distress, Focus on the Family offers free consultations with caring Christian counselors. Call 1-800-A-FAMILY (232-6459) during business hours to leave your name and number for a prompt callback.
Rosie Makinney’s book, Fight For Love: How To Take Your Marriage Back from Porn, is available through Focus on the Family with any donation.
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